Distracted Driving

Since I started toting around my precious cargo I’ve really made an effort to cut down on the phone calls, emails, and texts while driving.  Did I quit cold turkey?  No…  But you’ll rarely find me typing if my car is in motion.  Will I send a quick text while sitting at a stoplight?  Sure.   I know that’s still not ideal, but it’s a heck of a lot better than most people.  Despite my best efforts to be a more responsible driver, I sometimes think a 2-year old in the backseat is far more distracting than a cell phone, loud music, or trying to juggle a cheeseburger and fries while on the interstate.

In the 7 minutes it takes me to get from Junior’s daycare to our house in the evenings, I typically hear this coming from behind me:  “Mommy, mommy, mommy!  What’s THAT?  What’s THAT?  I see MOON!  Where’s the MOON mommy?  Stop singing mommy.  Sing more mommy!  Play Elmo song mommy.  ELMO SONG!  I want pancakes for dinner mommy.  Mac-n-cheese mommy.  I want animal cookies for dinner mommy!  What’s that mommy?  Where’s the moon?  I can’t see the moon mommy!  Get UP get UP!  AAAAAAHHHHHHH, I want to get UP!  Need juice.  Mommy I want the umbrella!  UMBRELLA!!!  Get UP mommy!”

Normally it’s just spirited (nonstop) chatter, but every now and then he gets peeved and decides he’s going to whine.  Or cry.  Or yell.  That’s when I feel like a cell phone is nowhere near as distracting as a kid.  Or how about when they keep dropping their item of choice over and over and over?  3 out of 4 times you’re able to contort your body and reach it while still holding the wheel and paying attention to the road.  But there’s always going to be that one time when it’s just out of reach and you have to leave it there on the floor.  God help us all when that happens.

I will say that my tendency to drive aggressively has really toned down though; well, at least when Junior’s strapped in with me.  I got my first speeding ticket not too long ago – first one EVER – and go figure it was in a school zone.  I wasn’t going terribly fast, but it was the 2nd week of school and that policeman was tucked in a driveway right across the street just waiting to pick people off.  During the summer months the speed limit on that road is 15 mph higher than it is during the school year, and I hadn’t re-trained myself to slow down yet.  I deserved it, and I’m far more conscious of my speed now because of it.  Unlike the a-hole last night who rode my tail and flashed her beams at me because she felt I was going too slowly.  For the record I wasn’t driving slowly; she just wanted to go 100 and couldn’t get by me because of other cars.  Sorry lady, I’m not going to drag race with you in your minivan.  Normally I would have done my best to box her in with the other cars, but I let her zoom past me and get a glimpse of my favorite finger.  She can drive like a creep all she wants; one day there will be a trooper waiting to pull her over.  I bet she’ll be texting when he gets her too.  Not me.  I’ll be singing Old MacDonald and trying to mop up spilled milk.  Texting is probably safer.  OMG, LOL, TTYL…


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